Categories
Future Habits Future Performance

Why Delaying Gratification Will Lead To Future Success

What To Expect? 

Do you struggle with delaying gratification? In today’s article, why delaying gratification will lead to future success. We will dig deeper through science to why delaying gratification is so successful and how you can train yourself to improve it too. This is a proven way to gain the success you desire and hopefully, you will come away having a clearer picture of how to implement the strategies yourself.

What Is Delayed Gratification?

Why Delaying Gratification Will Lead To Future Success

Delayed gratification is resisting the urge to accept the reward now. For the hope or known outcome of something better in the future.

It’s the ability to discipline one’s mind. To resist all immediate temptation to build momentum for a more desirable outcome.

Delayed Gratification vs Instant Gratification

Delaying or having instant gratification is the root of self-control. We are taught about gratification from a young age unknowingly with the tails of Adam and Eve about the apple incident.

Showing clearly the result of delay vs instant. By eating the apple Adam was told not to eat. He lost the opportunity for eternal paradise. The instant pleasure of something is great in the moment. But if you know there is something better to be had in the future. It’s worth the wait.

Delaying gratification is always the winning hand. It just takes a lot of self-control to stop yourself from the temptation of the now. This is what leads to divorces from cheating spouses or having debt from gambling all their money instead of putting it in an index fund.

Short term happiness does not always lead to the long term happiness you desire. It’s down to the actions we take every day that dictates what our future will look like.

I too have had these decisions to make when studying for an exam. I had the choice to watch the new episode of The Game Of Thrones or study for my exam.

When I choose the former it led to rubbish grades but when I choose the latter I achieved grades I was proud of and I still got to watch The Game Of Thrones.

The Marshmallow Experiment

The famous experiment first coined from the mind of Walter Mischel who wrote a fascinating book self-titled The Marshmallow Effect show’s how delaying gratification is an important skill to learn for future success.

I first saw the experiment on a BBC show growing up. Where a bunch of children were put into a room with one marshmallow.

They were told if they waited for the person to come back and not eat the marshmallow in front of them they would receive 2 marshmallows.

A simple proposition for adults to wait 15 minutes to receive double their return. However, all parents know a child under the age of 7 waiting 15 minutes is like waiting a lifetime.

It was definitely a fun experiment to watch and very funny seeing the children trying to resist. I then watched the same show but the children were now older.

The children who were able to delay gratification in the experiment. Went on to have more successful lives and were psychologically better adjusted, more dependable persons, more self-motivated, and as high school students scored significantly better with grades.

With the latest study conducted on these exact same participants in 2011, the research has shown that the characteristic has remained with the individuals for life.

This study has clearly shown how gratification works and why it’s a much-needed skill to learn when growing up as a child. The study also found that parents who overcontrol their toddlers risk undermining the development of their children’s self-control skills.

While those who support and encourage autonomy in problem-solving efforts. Are likely to maximize their children’s efforts at delaying gratification.


How To Train Yourself To Delay Gratification

Delaying gratification is simply being disciplined with yourself. Choosing the hard choice that will benefit your future vs the easy choice that will benefit the now. Countless studies have shown. When we delay gratification we always get a better outcome that makes us happier overall.

For example, eating chocolate cake might feel good in the short term but if it goes against your goal of losing weight. It’s not going to benefit you. We all have goals where we want outcomes that will be in our favour. For our mental wellbeing, finances, health, relationships or careers are achieved to a greater standard by delaying gratification specifically in those areas.

That’s Why Delaying Gratification Will Lead To Future Success

How you can achieve the success you want in your life is by following the 3 strategies below

Strategy 1: Think Bigger Picture

When making decisions you have to think bigger than today. You have to put yourself further ahead in your mind. If you keep thinking short term you will always make the mistake of choosing the easy. But when you see your future self. You will know it’s worth the temptation of the now for a better tomorrow.

Strategy 2: Promising Something Small And Then Delivering

Training the delay gratification muscle is important. Just like going to the gym, the muscle needs to be constantly used to see progress. How you can do this is by using the techniques of just starting and one more to go (1% growth). When your mind knows it can achieve something easily. The chances of delaying gratification seem a much simpler prospect and defiantly worth it for your mind. Then repeatedly do this over and over again until your brain says, 1) yes, it’s worth it to wait and 2) yes, I have the capability to do this.

Strategy 3: Keep Track Of Your Progress

Knowing yourself is important for being able to delay gratification. If you set yourself a goal of losing weight but you keep at night time eating snacks. You know it’s going to be difficult to succeed at losing weight.

With this information you can plan ahead by disciplining yourself to not eat anything at night, only have water at night to fill the stomach or exercise in the evening to take your mind away. Coming up with strategies to help you better delay gratification is important to maintain discipline over the long term.

Where To Go Now

I hope you enjoyed today’s article, why delaying gratification will lead to future success. By knowing that delaying gratification is paramount to success and long term happiness. We have to make choices today that will benefit our future self.

By thinking long term you can then plan in the short term. Training and mentally preparing your mind for what’s to come and how easily you can achieve it will help you develop your delaying gratification muscle.

Hi I'm Adam
Hi I’m Adam

I’ve spent over 10 years coaching and mentoring people within sport and business. I have many life skills that I have developed and I want to pass these skills on so people can find their best self. I believe it all starts in the mind and I write about valuable tools and strategies to help people grow in this area.

Categories
Future Leadership Future Performance

5 Ways How To Be An Amazing Mentor For The Right Person

What To Expect?

Do you want to mentor the right people for you? In today’s article, 5 ways how to be an amazing mentor for the right person. We will discuss the importance of being a mentor but also how you can be a quality mentor for the right person you are mentoring. This article is for coaches, leaders, managers and even parents who want to get the best out of someone they are mentoring. It’s a privilege to be able to mentor someone and I hope you gain the information you need to succeed. 

What Is A Role Of A Mentor?

5 Ways How To Be An Amazing Mentor For The Right Person

A mentor is someone who has gained knowledge and experience throughout their life. To then share that information with a mentee to help them succeed too. They will provide guidance, skills, emotional support and motivation to succeed.

A mentor will also clear the path for the mentee to follow without them having to struggle to find their way to achieving their goals. A mentor will help the mentee formulate plans, set goals, develop networks, and identify the best resources to learn from.

The role of a mentor is vast and a mentee can gain so much from having one. Learning from someone else’s knowledge and experience can help a mentee to progress so much faster and more efficient than if done all on their own.

Why You Can’t Be A Mentor For Everyone

I’ve always been someone who loves helping people and when I was young I was shocked when someone who clearly needed help won’t listen to the guidance on how to solve their problems.

In life, there are people who want solutions and people who want to dwell on their problems. There are people who relate to you and others don’t. There are people who like you and some you just annoy. Hopefully, you get the point that a mentor is not for everyone it’s for the right person.

When looking for a mentee to mentor. You have to find a mentee that wants to change and wants to listen to your message. Mentors should spend their time spreading their knowledge and experience to people who want to receive their message, not people who don’t.

Learn From The Best

To be a great mentor you first have to be a great mentee. When it comes to mentoring. The mentors with the greatest experience can teach the most valuable lessons. Life experience should not be taken for granted when becoming a great mentor.

By making sure you are the best mentor. You have to gain experience through theory and putting those theory’s to action and gaining the results you can teach others.

For mentees, it’s important to have the right mentor to provide you with the information you need. This doesn’t always mean they have a 50-year-old person it can be anyone who’s just further ahead of where you want to be.

Also being mindful that times change and what worked in the past might not work in the present. So having a mentor that’s five years ahead of you or a mentor that keeps adapting will allow the mentee to gain the best results.

5 Ways How To Be An Amazing Mentor For The Right Person

1.Take Time To Listen

The ability to listen more than you speak as a mentor is crucial for the success of the mentee. The reason being is that the mentee will have a goal in mind they want to achieve. If a mentor is just doing whatever they want. It will eventually cause conflict and the mentee will not listen to your instructions. By listening you help them to be heard but you can also find all the information you need to help someone. You just have to listen first.

2. Show You Care

Showing you care as a mentor helps build trust and respect with the mentee. You do this by being genuine and putting the other person first. The best way to achieve this is through your actions. Going above and beyond to make sure they have everything they need to succeed. A story that Cristiano Ronaldo always talks about is when his mentor Sir Alex Ferguson allowed him to take time away from football to go and grieve the passing of his father. There have been mentors in my own life who wouldn’t think to let you have time off to take care of personal issues. This goes to show the mentor cared about the individual and in return, Cristiano gave everything to his mentor.

3. You Have To Be Honest

Some people can find it hard, to be honest with someone if it will hurt their feelings. As a mentor being honest to your mentee is paramount to their success. As well as knowing what they’re doing right. They also need to know what they’re doing wrong. The feedback they need to receive is an honest review of where they are and what they need to move forward. By knowing your mentee you will know what tone of voice to use when you’re expressing your honest feedback. When you’re honest it creates uncomfortably in the short term but they will thank you in the long term.

4. Have A Clear Expectations

It’s important when mentoring anyone to have clear expectations, to begin with. This sets up the relationship boundaries, intentions and goals that each person needs to follow. If not done correctly then there is a high chance for misunderstanding, a lack of high performance and direction. I have witnessed both sides and setting a clear expectation changes everything in a positive light. It also weeds out people who are not a good match for your mentoring style, the vision you have for them and the working environment. So it’s a win-win for everyone. This means you work with the right people but also you can create an environment for success.

5. Understand That Everyone Is Different

When mentoring people you have to understand that everyone has different personalities, standards and upbringing. Treating everyone the same will allow only a selected amount of mentees to receive your mentorship in its best form. Adapting your approach to each person allows for an effective approach. Also understanding that people start at different levels. Some will need a lot of practice and some will pick it up quickly. Being patient to focus on their journey not comparing to what you think their journey should be.

A Final Word From Future Mindset 

I hope you enjoyed today’s article, 5 ways how to be an amazing mentor for the right person. Being a mentor is a great responsibility to have. Seeing the development of another person through your guidance is one of the best feelings in life. I hope the article has helped you on your mentoring journey. If you need any help or guidance with mentoring you can contact me at adam@thefuturemindset.com

Hi I'm Adam
Hi I’m Adam

I’ve spent over 10 years coaching and mentoring people within sport and business. I have many life skills that I have developed and I want to pass these skills on so people can find their best self. I believe it all starts in the mind and I write about valuable tools and strategies to help people grow in this area.