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Overcoming Challenges Resilience & Grit

Conquer Life’s Challenges with the ‘Embrace, Own, Overcome’ Principle

Embarking on my usual morning walk, I found myself immersed in a podcast featuring Joko Willink, a former Navy SEAL renowned for crafting a mindset synonymous with victory. It was during this stroll that a simple yet profound question echoed through my earbuds, directed at Willink: How does he react in the face of obstacles? His response, delivered with unwavering simplicity, resonated deeply within me – a single word that carried immense power: “Good.”

As those four letters bounced around in my mind, I couldn’t help but reassess my own approach to life’s challenges. At that moment, the seed of curiosity was planted – how do I truly navigate the hurdles that life throws my way?

In the upcoming exploration, I aim to delve into the intricate layers of the mindset required to conquer any obstacle life presents. Willink’s nonchalant yet impactful “Good” served as the catalyst, prompting a journey into the profound realm of mental resilience and the profound art of overcoming adversity. Join me as we unravel the secrets of a mindset needed to overcome any obstacle, discovering the transformative power hidden within the simplicity of a single word.

Daily Obstacle Roadblocks

In our daily grind, we all come across different hurdles – some are common to everyone, while others are more like our own personal puzzles. Life throws challenges at all of us, but it’s not about the type of problems we face; it’s more about how we deal with them that shapes where we end up.

Picture this: when something scary pops up, our reactions are a bit like fight, flight, or freeze. It’s the same deal with life’s obstacles. Take that overdue bill you find in the mailbox – you can either face it, ignore it and hope it magically disappears, or just run away from it. Nobody likes problems, but avoiding them usually makes things worse.

Now, here’s the key – training our minds to handle these problems is crucial. This is where Joko comes in with his straightforward approach. Instead of making things complicated or finding excuses, he just says “Good” and tackles the issue. It’s like having a superpower to cut through the noise and get things done.

As good as this sounds having a clear plan of how to tackle obstacles would be of great help. I got studying and I managed to come up with a 3-step principle that can be followed effectively to any obstacle. Here’s my results…

1. Embrace the Obstacle

The Power of Simplicity

What led me to pen down these thoughts was the profound way in which Joko approaches obstacles. Upon analysis, it becomes clear that his strategy revolves around fundamentally accepting the obstacle at hand. Joko grasps the reality that certain challenges are beyond his control; however, he firmly acknowledges that he has full control over how he responds.

This mindset not only facilitates taking 100% responsibility for the situation but also aligns seamlessly with the principles of positive reframing. The seemingly simple yet potent declaration of “Good” acts as a conceptual Tardis, appearing compact on the surface but expanding into a vast realm of meaning. Drawing a parallel with the word “love,” it encapsulates multifaceted sentiments, from a parent’s love for their child to the camaraderie experienced by war veterans.

Joko masterfully distils complexity into simplicity, a true art form. Confronted with any obstacle today, tomorrow, or throughout one’s life, uttering a resolute “good” becomes a transformative act. To take action today you have to accept what’s in front of you, own what’s in front of you and then overcome what’s in front of you. Through this, the realisation dawns that achieving anything in life is possible, marking the cultivation of an essential aspect of the mindset warrior within.

See It as a Learning Opportunity

When it comes to obstacles, the reason why you solve them or not is how you view the challenge (find data). You can look at it with dread and the mindset that it’s impossible or you can change your direction of thinking to a learning opportunity. This allows you to take the pressure off solving the problem but see the challenge as a place to grow. With this, the mind will be calm and allow you to focus on solving the problem.

Turning Obstacles into Advantages

Embracing challenges presents an opportunity to undergo personal development, nurture resilience, and cultivate virtues. Drawing inspiration from Stoic philosophy, Ryan Holiday coined the phrase “The obstacle is the way,” suggesting that obstacles, rather than hindering progress, often pave the way to success.

This mindset towards obstacles offers distinct advantages in how you perceive problems. It encourages you not only to accept but also to actively seek out obstacles, recognizing their inevitability much like the regular rising and setting of the sun. Many individuals shy away from life’s obstacles, yet, to reap the rewards of accomplishing our goals, facing these challenges becomes imperative. The next time you encounter an obstacle, understand that navigating it is not merely a detour but indeed “the way” to your desired destination.

Embrace What We Can and Cannot Control

Understanding what is within your control and what is not holds significance for maintaining clear thoughts and directing your energy effectively. In the complexity of life, many attempt to micromanage every aspect, only to find that life can throw unexpected challenges regardless. Personally, I cherish the idea of controlling my daily routine, desiring moments of silence for writing. However, the unpredictability of life introduces interruptions, like a 4-year-old needing attention or encountering misunderstandings when trying to convey my point of view. The list of things we attempt to control is extensive, yet fundamentally, we lack control over most of these aspects.

Even our bodies, often assumed to be under our control, were recognized by the Stoics of the past as not entirely within our dominion. External forces can render us slaves or imprison us without any justifiable reason. The empowering revelation, however, is that amid this lack of control, there remains one constant – our mind. Despite the overwhelming emotions, fear, or the chaotic nature of our thoughts, we possess the ability to make choices.

In the face of every obstacle, the decisive factor in the outcome lies in the one thing we can truly control – our mind. The strength of the mind directly correlates with the strength of one’s will. Embracing your mind becomes the key to problem-solving, allowing you to leave the rest to the unpredictable forces of the universe.

Therefore, when confronted with an obstacle, adopt a mindset that values simplicity, acknowledges the potential for personal growth, embraces a change in perspective, and directs your focus solely on what you can control – your mind.

2. Own Your Response

Take 100% Ownership

Taking ownership of what happens in your life is an integral part of overcoming obstacles. We all know someone who makes excuses for every problem they face. The child who always blames the teacher or the politicians who blame everyone but themselves. This is weakness, an easy temptation that tries to protect our ego from the truth, our shortcomings.

The Dalai Lama said it best, “When you think everything is someone else’s fault, you will suffer a lot. When you realize everything springs only from yourself, you will learn both peace and joy.”

Taking that level of responsibility allows you to face an obstacle without passing blame. I have seen people blame God for their problems, blame their parents at 30 years of age for their shortcomings, and even blame the weather for ruining their day. When we hand over that level of responsibility to others, we are only left with pain and more suffering. All this and you’re still short of overcoming the obstacle in your way.

Taking 100% responsibility for everything, even if it seems unfair, will keep the power in your hands and allow clarity of mind to overcome any obstacle. How I look at it is when you’re exercising and the voice in your head is telling you to quit, it’s just the same voice trying to protect you from fault. You just have to be kind to the voice and say not today and change that habit.

Be Adaptable

Effectively responding to problems demands adaptability to change. Life’s journey is unpredictable and takes unexpected turns. For instance, picture a project at work taking an unexpected turn due to market shifts. Being adaptable means swiftly reassessing your strategy, adjusting to the new landscape, and finding innovative solutions to propel the project forward. Embracing the inevitability of change daily keeps you mentally prepared and agile.

This adaptability is a cornerstone in overcoming any obstacle, ensuring you can navigate the twists and turns of life with resilience and readiness for transformation.

Develop Adaptive Thinking

Beyond adaptability lies the power of adaptive thinking—a superpower for tackling obstacles. Recognizing that there’s no one-size-fits-all solution, cultivating adaptive thinking allows you to explore numerous pathways. For instance, when facing a personal challenge, such as a career setback, adaptive thinking involves considering various career paths, upskilling, or even venturing into entrepreneurship. This flexibility enables you to proactively shape your professional journey.

Openness to alternative perspectives and approaches enhances your flexibility in problem-solving. Embracing diverse strategies for different obstacles becomes second nature, empowering you to navigate challenges with creativity and a dynamic mindset.

Practice Resilience

The resilience muscle is pivotal in overcoming obstacles. A weak resilience muscle leaves you vulnerable to feeling overwhelmed and losing control. For example, imagine facing a series of personal setbacks, such as financial struggles. Practicing resilience means viewing these setbacks as temporary hurdles.

By reassessing financial goals, budgeting strategically, and seeking additional income sources, you can turn these challenges into opportunities for financial growth and stability. Strengthening this muscle involves viewing setbacks as temporary and surmountable. This proactive approach propels your mindset into a state of growth, granting you control over your responses. Building resilience transforms challenges into opportunities for personal growth, fostering the ability to bounce back and endure the trials that life presents.

3. Overcome With Positivity

Positive Re-framing

Positive psychology research suggests that adopting a positive framing or optimistic perspective contributes to increased resilience, better emotional well-being, and improved problem-solving skills (Seligman, 2002). In the modern age, an optimistic perspective is needed to make the necessary changes to grow.

A lot of people are still hardwired for pessimism which allowed our ancestors to spot danger in keeping us alive from predatory danger. Luckily, most of us are living without the threat of someone trying to eat us every day so we have to quiet down our chimp mind and focus more on the human part of our brain. This will allow focus on positive outcomes to problems.

This is where the transformative power of positive reframing truly comes into play. Embracing a positive perspective enables you to unlock a realm of possibilities, allowing you to see beyond the limitations of obstacles. Developing self-awareness in how you respond to challenges is crucial; it unveils the habits in place and sheds light on what does and doesn’t work. By training your mind to dismiss the negative and redirect focus toward the positive, the impact can be monumental.

Picture a bomb expert arriving at the scene and solely fixating on the negatives of the situation – they would never approach the bomb to defuse it. Positive reframing is the key that empowers you to step forward, assess, and navigate obstacles with a solution-oriented mindset.

With any obstacle have the perspective of it being an opportunity to grow is the perception change needed to overcome any obstacle.

Break Down the Obstacle

When faced with a substantial obstacle, especially a complex problem, viewing it in its entirety can be overwhelming. Consider, for instance, a challenging project at work. Breaking down the obstacle into small, manageable chunks becomes crucial in maintaining a positive attitude and focusing on the task at hand.

Picture the project broken into distinct phases or tasks, allowing you to tackle each part systematically. This approach not only prevents feelings of being overwhelmed but also builds a sense of accomplishment as you make progress. Momentum is vital, especially in time-sensitive situations. By looking at the obstacle and working backwards in your thinking, you can navigate challenges more efficiently, moving forward faster.

Celebrate Small Wins

Not all obstacles are solved overnight, and staying positive is of utmost priority. Imagine a personal goal, like adopting a healthier lifestyle. The importance of celebrating the small wins, such as choosing a nutritious meal or completing a workout, keeps the mind focused and calm. This celebration allows you to maintain a clear mindset and not get bogged down in the enormity of overcoming the overall problem.

Acknowledging and celebrating these incremental achievements create a positive feedback loop, reinforcing your commitment to overcoming obstacles with perseverance and a sense of accomplishment.

Principle of Obstacle Mastery: Embrace, Own, Overcome

Inspired by the resilience of individuals like Joko, the principle of obstacle mastery advocates for a transformative approach to challenges. Here’s a simple three-step guide:

  1. Embrace the Obstacle:
    • Acknowledge and accept challenges as part of life’s journey. Recognize that some things are beyond your control, but your response is within your power.
  2. Own Your Response:
    • Take 100% responsibility for how you deal with obstacles. Focus on what you can influence – your mindset, actions, and decisions.
  3. Overcome with Positivity:
    • Apply positive reframing, encapsulated in a simple “Good” mindset. See obstacles not as roadblocks but as opportunities for growth. Confront, tackle, and learn from each challenge.

By adopting this principle, you empower yourself to navigate life’s hurdles with resilience, turning every obstacle into a stepping stone toward personal growth and achievement. Embrace, own, and overcome – the pathway to becoming a mindset warrior.

Categories
Habits Overcoming Challenges

How To Get Yourself Out Of A Rut In 4 Easy Steps

We all know habits can change for the worse in a way that sneaks up on us. You will know yourself of the creation of a negative loop that can seem impossible to get out of. I call this the rut.

In this article today, you’ll get my account of being in a rut, my student’s experiences and what the science says. All to help you make that subtle mindset shift back to being on the right track.

You will find out;

  • How to notice when a rut is happening to help you change course.
  • Learning how to kickstart your habits to avoid further procrastination.
  • To combat entering into a rut by evolving your habits, so they become more exciting.

First, let us understand why we get into a rut in the first place and why it’s so dammed hard to escape from.

Understanding The Rut

Before you can establish how to get out of a rut, you have to understand why you are in a rut in the first place.

From my own experience, I get into a rut when the impulse of something new loses its appeal. It can even be as simple as a little change to my routine of going on holiday or a change to my schedule. From this new habits form that is not as productive. That lead me to enter a negative loop and stop all the good that came before it.

The rut as I like to call it often sneaks up on you unexpectedly. I’m sure like yourself, you have never planned to have bad habits or to procrastinate.

I have come to the conclusion that we are all susceptible to enjoying the now. We are not always so quick to focus on the mistakes of the past and the delayed gratification of our future.

Maybe this is hard-wired into our system that when we find the comfort we should embrace it because it might not last. Very much how the early humans must have lived whilst seeking shelter from predators.

Conserving energy must have been a necessity when wondering when the next meal will come. The problem is now we can stay in our comfort zone for extended periods of time with no threats from others. Even food can be delivered to us with a click of a button.

That’s why to overcome the rut, we must be proactive in our fight against it.

Just know that going into a rut is normal. We just have to tap into our human brain to overcome it.

The Classic Psychological Signs That You’re In A Rut

The closest a rut gets to a psychological disorder is what’s called dysthymia. A diagnosis few have heard of but is in fact a mild form of depression. The feeling you get when you’re in a rut can make you feel like you are depressed. In fact majority of the time, it’s your brain on standby needing to be refuelled and restarted to go again.

Here below are some of the feelings & signs your in a rut;

  • You feel like your life is on a negative loop
  • The body and mind feel tired all the time
  • You snap over the littlest of things
  • Your best self is nowhere to be seen
  • People are always asking if your ok

Once you know why the rut happens and the signs that you are in a rut or entering a rut. You can then start to formulise new habits to help you get back on track.

4 Proven Habits To Get You Back On Track

Establish A Daily Routine Of Journaling

What gets you into a rut, keeps you in a rut and prevents you from getting out of a rut? Is your inability to unjumble your thoughts and create clarity and focus.

That’s where journaling comes in. It’s a simple but effective way that has not only changed my life but all my students who I have prescribed this too.

These are the heading you should write down to answer;

  • What parts of my life are not going the way I want?
  • Why is …… not working out?
  • How can change ……. to make it into a better habit?

For the mind, this action is like you defrosting your car in the morning before work. The brain will instantly become clearer and more focussed again from its previous inactivity.

To stop this from happening again. Keep track of your habits. It will go a long way to spotting negative changes that you can swerve away from to stay on the right track.

Start Small & Start Easy

What stops people from getting out of a rut the most is trying to set change with difficult undertakings. Setting big goals sounds good in theory when enacting change. I’ve been there where I have written down my goals the night before. I am super motivated for the next day to come. To then find how easy it is to procrastinate because it’s challenging to perform.

You are not alone in making this good-intention mistake. To get out of a rut however you have to start small and easy.

If your goal is to go to the gym. To make it small and easy I would set out all my clothes and equipment the previous night to make it easy to get out the door. To make it small I would say I’m going to go there and do a 5-minute workout.

If it’s an exercise you are after you can simplify going to the gym by exercising at home instead.

From what I learned from James Clear in Atomic Habits. You can attach the goal of going to the gym by having it close to your workplace. So finishing work is associated with going to the gym instead of going home.

You can apply this technique above with any goal that you’re struggling to perform. Especially when you are in a rut making it small and easy will help so much in pulling you out.

Move Your Body

What keeps you in a rut is inactivity. When the body doesn’t move the body turns into a sluggish mode, the very opposite of action. You become tired and unwilling to make the right choices. It’s like your body and mind which are linked together, are in sleep mode.

How you get out of this is simple, move your body. It doesn’t matter what you do whether it’s going for a brisk walk or stretching your body.

You can live by this motto. To kickstart your mind you have to kickstart your body.

I have found this work well when my mind is sluggish. All it needs is the body to move.

Look at it like electricity. To power the world we need electricity to switch on the lights or power our phones. Our brains are the same, without constant action powering our muscles they will be lost.

Change Your Environment

Nothing gets you into a rut like doing the same thing day in and day out. Creating an autopilot that puts you into a zombie-like daze.

Changing your environment is a surefire way to prevent you from going into a rut and how you get out of a rut.

  • To prevent this from happening;
  • Change your walk or car ride home every week.
  • Plan a weekend getaway once a month
  • Ask your boss to work from home 2 days a week.

Get creative in how you can make your everyday life more enjoyable. Your brain loves new things and works to update the new changes all the time.

When you know you’re in a rut, you have to take more drastic action. You can do this by getting completely away from your environment. I would recommend city trips, days in nature or spending time with friends and family you haven’t seen in a while.

The message here is to change your environment for more than a day to refresh your mind.

By understanding this you will always have a way of controlling the rut from affecting your life.

Life can get boring and monotonous sometimes. Adding something different into your life can be the excitement needed to avoid the rut.

Mindset Shift

Applying all the above will help you make the mindset shift needed to change your life. These four habits have changed mine and the students I have shared them with.

Comment and like your thoughts below.