Categories
Future Parenting

Parent Mindset: How To Support Your Child With Their New Emotions

Mindful Parent Series Article 3 New Emotions – Today’s article how to support your child with their new emotions explores how we as parents can understand our children ever-evolving emotions, how not to compare their emotions to an adult and how the child can learn how to connect and understand their own emotions.

It’s definitely a challenge we face as parents but we hope you can understand you are not alone with the experiences you are going through and together we can develop healthy mindful children for the future.

How To Help Your Child Express Their Feelings

As parents, it’s crucial to allow your child the freedom to express themselves. As well as expressing emotions like laughter and happiness but also when they’re sad and angry too.

Too often parents can tell a child to stop crying and stop getting angry. This is the wrong way to teach a child these complex emotions. It stops the child from expressing this emotion as they deem it to be bad. This can lead to issues in adulthood by expressing or controlling these emotions.

The best thing a parent can do is for every emotion the child expresses you are there to guide them through it. Not send them to their room so they can cry alone. Be there by there side showing love and teaching them how to feel and control their emotions.

How To Help A Child Regulate Their New Emotions

  1. Talk about emotions with your child.
  2. When your child struggles with a strong feeling, encourage her to name the feeling and what caused it.
  3. Help your child find appropriate ways to react to strong emotions.
  4. Remember to be patient.
  5. Help them find techniques like breathing and journaling to express their emotions.

At What Age Can A Child Control Their New Emotions

There is no correct answer to this. It all depends on the individual and what the child has learned and applied to deal with every emotion. With so many emotions to deal with like embarrassment which wasn’t a problem until our son became 7 years old.

The ever-evolving emotions of a child into the teenage years and then into adulthood could be ever-changing. Being with them for every challenge they go through will help them one day have full control of their emotions.

How To Be Their Emotionally For Your Child

As simple as it may sound. Being present with your child is of importance. Like anything when your present, people know you care and trust the feelings you have towards them is genuine. When they’re angry or sad being their support system can help the child cope and learn that emotions are not forever and they will pass in time.

How To Emotionally Connect With Your Child

Spending time with your child, understanding and overcoming emotions together will help build a strong bond. Laughing at a funny story together, overcoming hardship and finding a way to win together or when feeling of sadness or guilt learning to express these emotions aloud or in a journal to deal with it. Being by the side of your child through their life will build an emotional connection that will be as strong as any connection a human can have.

Over To You Parents

Thank you for reading today’s article on how to support your child with their new emotions

Parenting is a challenging job. I think the core message to raise mentally healthy children is to,

  1. Provide a safe environment for them to express their emotions without fear of retribution.
  2. Be present as a parent to deal with their emotions.
  3. Teach them techniques to be able to deal with emotions on their own.
  4. Be patient with your child, don’t rush them into being an adult too quick.

What do you think? Am I way off hear or has this opened your eyes a little?

We would love to hear.

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Hi I'm Adam
Hi I’m Adam

I’ve spent over 10 years coaching and mentoring people within sport and business. I have many life skills that I have developed and I want to pass these skills on so people can find their best self. I believe it all starts in the mind and I write about valuable tools and strategies to help people grow in this area.

Categories
Future Habits Future Relationship

Why Listening To Your Spouse Is Important

a couple on the beach

Introduction

Why Listening To Your Spouse Is Important? This is a question i have been asking myself. So i decided to write the strategies I’ve applied that have helped me become a better husband.

Has your relationship has some ups and downs? I’d say the answer is an overwhelming YES. The reason why is because we are not paying attention to his/her needs. One of main reason for breakups is the lack of listening to their partner’s needs.

Listening to your spouse is one of the most important parts of keeping the relationship going in the right direction. This is what i have found from my experience.

Overtime in a relationship people become comfortable with their surroundings and their relationship together. Once upon a time when dating I’m sure everyone is thinking of how can I get this person to like me. You will do all you can by listening out for their likes and dislikes and adapting accordingly. You will find out what food they like, what music their into and what turns them on in the bedroom.

When courting we are really good at listening out for their needs and desires. The reason why overtime difficulties can surface is that we stop listening to their wants and needs. We just focus on ours which won’t always align with theirs.

So below are some tips that have not only helped me improve my relationship of 8 years but will help yours flourish too.

1. Start Listening Again

Listening to your spouse is super important when it comes to keeping your relationship going in the right direction. Have you ever been preoccupied with the sport your watching. Then in the background you just hear what your partners saying. If they asked what they said. You would have no clue because you was more focused on your game. What this means in your relationship is that you are just hearing what they have to say but you are not listening to what they say.

This shows a lack of respect for them and you care more about your needs than theirs. Over time this will move you both further and further from each other and this leads to a break down in communication.

I challenge you today. Look at your partner in their eyes and listen to what they have to say. If you care about them, help them to feel valued with your response and your actions.

2. Have One Day Of The Week Where You Focus On What They Want

By listening to your spouse needs this will definitely help them feel like you care about them. As we get older more responsibilities can weigh us down. You can then get sucked into what you’re doing on a constant basis.

I was working 7 days a week physically and mentally. The little time I gave my spouse was not enough. Being selfish to my life’s ambitions made me forget about the person who I’m going to spend my life with. Every partner wants to feel like they matter in your life. So by setting aside 1 day of the week where you can just focus on their goals. Listen to their problems and just be present in their life can go along way.

3. Surprise Them

Remember when you were dating, did you ever surprise your spouse? I bet you were listening to your spouse every desire and acting accordingly. I know I was. Every other day i was surprising her with flowers, chocolates, restaurants and hotels. When you surprise someone the response you get is normally excitement and feeling of being alive.

As relationships go on things become comfortable and the surprise factor dries up. Well after years of surprise neglect I brought it back and it worked perfectly in making my partner feel great. I surprised her with flowers and even little notes around the house of how much I appreciated her. This went down a treat.

Then I listened to my spouse desire to go to Madrid. So I booked in advance a 3 day weekend, what a great time we had. These things matter in a relationship or the fire will soon burn out. So keep the fire alive by bringing some surprise factor back into your relationship. Make them feel like they are your main priority.

4. Try Not To Give Coaching Advice

When in a relationship you want the best for your spouse. This can even lead to you giving them advice on how to improve themselves. From my experience, my wife is not with me for my coaching abilities.

So when I dish out loads of advice for her to improve on it doesn’t go down to well. What I’ve learned is that people need to sometimes just let loose of all there problems they have faced throughout there day or week as a release system to get it gone.

As a husband that’s sometimes what I have to do is just listen and let her get whatever she’s going through off her chest with no judgement or coaching advice.

What does work is listening out to signals for when they do want help. Then if you can help, help, but only when she calls out for it.

5. Listen to their emotional state

Within a relationship, there will be highs and lows of emotion. What really can help a relationship flourish is listening out for signals of when to engage and disengage.

So for example, what doesn’t help is when both of you are angry at the same time like to moose ready to battle each other. What I’ve learned is that when she’s angry at me, I listen and I feel I can no longer listen. I move away from the situation. Where later in a calmer mood the problem gets easily resolved instead of days without speaking to each other.

Also listening to when they’re feeling down and maybe they need time with you or maybe need some time alone from you.

By listening to your partner emotional state is like guitar hero. The more you hit the right note the happier your relationship will move forward.

To conclude, listening is one of the most important parts of a flourishing relationship. We are super good at listening when we are dating or in that honeymoon period. What stops the relationship developing and staying happy is when we stop listening to the needs of our partner. When we just think of ourselves. We might as well pack up shop and just live on our own because a relationship is not about one person. It’s about 2 people being connected and listening to each other’s needs and wants.

So if your relationship needs some work, start today by listening and watch the magic start coming back.