habits Archives - Page 10 of 22 - The Future Mindset

Where Does Expectation Come From?

Expectation comes from everywhere around you. The expectation of life can be different based on your family, location, countries values and expectations of what people must do. It’s an imaginary entity that creates so much power in peoples life. An amazing article on how expectation influences perception is in the link here.

It’s yours to control but too many put their mental health at risk by having a high expectation that falls flat. This can be the difference between you achieving the life you want or giving up because you have made yourself believe it’s not for you.

How Having A High Expectation Interacts With Your Mind

When anyone sets an expectation it’s of course to set the benchmark to improve and do better. You have probably heard the terms 10x your mindset famously coined by Grant Cardone. This is an exceptional movement of the invisible line that can propel people forward in their life. What people don’t understand when they aspire to have a high expectation that’s 10x. Is that these people were dormant with the skillset required to elevate themself forward.

Compared if you started to have these new high expectations to 10x to be an Astronaut but knew nothing about what it takes to be an Astronaut. You would fail quickly and painfully very fast and could lead to your belief that it’s not for you. The failure of these high expectations leads to a lowering in confidence that affects the mind in negative ways. That can change your whole approach to life.

How Our Life Experience Is Affected By Expectation Of Life

Expectation vs reality plays a major role in the feeling we get from the expectation of life we set ourselves. Too many people live in a reality in their minds where they expect themselves to be millionaires within a year.

The expectation vs reality has to be a cohesive match where the attainment of being a millionaire within 1 year is based on the systems and structures you have in place to get there. Or else the expectation vs reality will be a failure, and the mind’s confidence and well-being will be affected.

So when setting expectations you have to base It on reality where the chances of you hitting your target are likely possible with the right actions. You should treat expectations like a game of guitar heroes with every effortlessly placed click that will build the Law Of Momentum.

When you set your expectations the right way you will start to build momentum in your life. If you feel like being a bit of a yo-yo then your expectations your setting are out of balance. By evaluating your expectation vs reality on a consistent basis you can get a real feel for what’s realistic and what’s not.

Expectation has levels. My level compared to Elon Musk is completely different. Likewise, Elon’s level would have been different when he compared himself growing up to Bill Gates for example. Only now has he caught him up financially where now you could say he is a level ahead with expectations my venturing into space.

5 Ways How Your Expectation Of Life Affects The Mind

1. Expecting To Have Your Life All Together

The expectation of life is that the older you get the easier you will get life right? I don’t know about you but this is what I thought. In some ways it’s true but in so many other ways it’s definitely not. Life throws curve balls. The more you progress the more problems increase. You reading this could be 30 and still be living at home not having a clue what your life holds because you expect it all to be figured out.

The solution to this expectation is to expect you will never figure out the perfect life. You understand that life is changeable and what I believe in my 20s will be different in my 40s. The only thing you should expect of yourself is to create systems where your basic needs are taken care of alongside systems that can create great wealth. From there just enjoy the life you have today and stay in the present as much as possible. I’m still trying to figure my life out. It’s normal but expecting to have your life altogether in a nice bow is a myth. A myth you shouldn’t focus on. Just enjoy today.

2. Expecting Life To Be fair

When we leave our parents stewardship and head into life on our own two feet. We can expect that life will be fair and true. Life is far from this. Life will not be fair to you just because you expect it to.

The solution to this is to expect that life will not be fair. So when you come up against any unfairness you will know it’s not your fault but it’s a part of life. From there you can plan how to navigate around it to get your desired outcome. I expected to get promoted to a management level in an early job. I was doing all the right things but was let down by others around me. Instead of dwelling on why life is not fair. I expected that this would happen and learned how I could mitigate this from happening again. With subtle changes and an expectation to prepare for this, I achieved what I wanted without a loss of mindset.

3. Expecting Everything Will Work It Self Out

The illusion of expecting everything will work itself out. Whether I addressed the problem or not is a dangerous game to play. Things don’t magically happen. It’s based on action taken place that changes the outcome. Lack of action just makes the problem bigger in magnitude.

The solution here is to expect everything will work out by taking action. That subtle difference in wording changes everything. Since this has become an expectation I have followed. I have improved my finances, relationships and my business decisions. Life is not handed to you. The expectation of life is to take action.

4. Expecting Everyone To Like Me

The expectation that everyone will like me for me. Will set your well-being up for failure. It doesn’t matter how likeable or kind you think you are. There will always be people who won’t like you because of your personality, your positivity, your outlook on life or they’re jealous of you. I fell into this trap where I expected everyone to like me if I just change this or I just change that. This constant change of who I was to benefit someone else is not only a confidence nightmare. It goes against your true nature and who you are as a person.

The solution here is to expect that not everyone will like you and that’s ok. As long as you are true to yourself the right people will be attracted. The ones who do not. It has more to do with them than it has to do with you.

6. Expectation On Success

Everyone’s expectation of success is different. But too many look to celebrity culture as a guide to what success is. I too had this outlook where I expected success to be when I have a fancy home, supercar, high-end clothes etc. This is all a lie. Success is whatever you think success is. I’m successful because I am there for my children every single day. I am successful because I focus on developing myself to become a better person daily.

The solution here to find what success means to you and when your expectation meets your reality and not someone else’s. That’s when your wellbeing and mind can be in tune with each other and you can be happy with your accomplishments. As well as setting yourself expectations of what you want in your life that means something to you. Not someone having a life you think you should have.

How To Set Realistic Expectations

First don’t set expectations based on what others expect from you. People can make suggestions but you have to make decisions. You first have to train your mind to have the expectation of a life that you want. This is non-negotiable. Too many people myself included have fallen into the expectation trap that doesn’t align with your values, spirit and skillet to fall flat on your face. You then throw a pity party about how bad you are at life. This is all pre-programmed in the mind to do when we fail at the expectation that should never have been set for ourselves in the first place.

You have to sit down with yourself and get to know yourself truly and what you are capable of completing presently. Once you know what you can do and what you want to do. You can set realistic expectations to achieve with a realistic time limit to complete. Once you hit this goal your confidence and wellbeing will be awoken. Your life has now begun the chapter you’ve always wanted to read. Set when your creating your expectation of life. Make sure the expectation VS reality is in your mind. From here you can achieve success and feel good at the same time whist moving forward with harder challenges that you can achieve.

PLEASE COMMENT AND SHARE YOUR STORIES

Has this helped you today? What do you think, should you be realistic with your expectation or should you set a high expectation. I would love to hear your thoughts and your experiences with dealing with the expectation of life. Always remember you’re not alone and everything can change by developing your mindset.

A Final Word From The Future Mindset

I hope you enjoyed today’s article If you’re struggling with dealing with mastering your own mindset. Don’t worry you’re not alone. Millions of people go through the same experience every day. I hope the article has helped in some way. If you need extra help or any questions answered. Don’t hesitate to contact me at adam@thefuturemindset.com

@thefuturemindset/@futuremindset_

What To Expect?

Do you struggle with delaying gratification? In today’s article, why delaying gratification will lead to future success. We will dig deeper through science to why delaying gratification is so successful and how you can train yourself to improve it too. This is a proven way to gain the success you desire and hopefully, you will come away having a clearer picture of how to implement the strategies yourself.

What Is Delayed Gratification?

Delayed gratification is resisting the urge to accept the reward now. For the hope or known outcome of something better in the future.

It’s the ability to discipline one’s mind. To resist all immediate temptation to build momentum for a more desirable outcome.

Delayed Gratification vs Instant Gratification

Delaying or having instant gratification is the root of self-control. We are taught about gratification from a young age unknowingly with the tails of Adam and Eve about the apple incident.

Showing clearly the result of delay vs instant. By eating the apple Adam was told not to eat. He lost the opportunity for eternal paradise. The instant pleasure of something is great in the moment. But if you know there is something better to be had in the future. It’s worth the wait.

Delaying gratification is always the winning hand. It just takes a lot of self-control to stop yourself from the temptation of the now. This is what leads to divorces from cheating spouses or having debt from gambling all their money instead of putting it in an index fund.

Short term happiness does not always lead to the long term happiness you desire. It’s down to the actions we take every day that dictates what our future will look like.

I too have had these decisions to make when studying for an exam. I had the choice to watch the new episode of The Game Of Thrones or study for my exam.

When I choose the former it led to rubbish grades but when I choose the latter I achieved grades I was proud of and I still got to watch The Game Of Thrones.

The Marshmallow Experiment

The famous experiment first coined from the mind of Walter Mischel who wrote a fascinating book self-titled The Marshmallow Effect show’s how delaying gratification is an important skill to learn for future success.

I first saw the experiment on a BBC show growing up. Where a bunch of children were put into a room with one marshmallow.

They were told if they waited for the person to come back and not eat the marshmallow in front of them they would receive 2 marshmallows.

A simple proposition for adults to wait 15 minutes to receive double their return. However, all parents know a child under the age of 7 waiting 15 minutes is like waiting a lifetime.

It was definitely a fun experiment to watch and very funny seeing the children trying to resist. I then watched the same show but the children were now older.

The children who were able to delay gratification in the experiment. Went on to have more successful lives and were psychologically better adjusted, more dependable persons, more self-motivated, and as high school students scored significantly better with grades.

With the latest study conducted on these exact same participants in 2011, the research has shown that the characteristic has remained with the individuals for life.

This study has clearly shown how gratification works and why it’s a much-needed skill to learn when growing up as a child. The study also found that parents who overcontrol their toddlers risk undermining the development of their children’s self-control skills.

While those who support and encourage autonomy in problem-solving efforts. Are likely to maximize their children’s efforts at delaying gratification.

How To Train Yourself To Delay Gratification

Delaying gratification is simply being disciplined with yourself. Choosing the hard choice that will benefit your future vs the easy choice that will benefit the now. Countless studies have shown. When we delay gratification we always get a better outcome that makes us happier overall.

For example, eating chocolate cake might feel good in the short term but if it goes against your goal of losing weight. It’s not going to benefit you. We all have goals where we want outcomes that will be in our favour. For our mental wellbeing, finances, health, relationships or careers are achieved to a greater standard by delaying gratification specifically in those areas.

That’s Why Delaying Gratification Will Lead To Future Success

How you can achieve the success you want in your life is by following the 3 strategies below

Strategy 1: Think Bigger Picture

When making decisions you have to think bigger than today. You have to put yourself further ahead in your mind. If you keep thinking short term you will always make the mistake of choosing the easy. But when you see your future self. You will know it’s worth the temptation of the now for a better tomorrow.

Strategy 2: Promising Something Small And Then Delivering

Training the delay gratification muscle is important. Just like going to the gym, the muscle needs to be constantly used to see progress. How you can do this is by using the techniques of just starting and one more to go (1% growth). When your mind knows it can achieve something easily. The chances of delaying gratification seem a much simpler prospect and defiantly worth it for your mind. Then repeatedly do this over and over again until your brain says, 1) yes, it’s worth it to wait and 2) yes, I have the capability to do this.

Strategy 3: Keep Track Of Your Progress

Knowing yourself is important for being able to delay gratification. If you set yourself a goal of losing weight but you keep at night time eating snacks. You know it’s going to be difficult to succeed at losing weight.

With this information you can plan ahead by disciplining yourself to not eat anything at night, only have water at night to fill the stomach or exercise in the evening to take your mind away. Coming up with strategies to help you better delay gratification is important to maintain discipline over the long term.

Where To Go Now

I hope you enjoyed today’s article, why delaying gratification will lead to future success. By knowing that delaying gratification is paramount to success and long term happiness. We have to make choices today that will benefit our future self.

By thinking long term you can then plan in the short term. Training and mentally preparing your mind for what’s to come and how easily you can achieve it will help you develop your delaying gratification muscle.

Hi I’m Adam

I’ve spent over 10 years coaching and mentoring people within sport and business. I have many life skills that I have developed and I want to pass these skills on so people can find their best self. I believe it all starts in the mind and I write about valuable tools and strategies to help people grow in this area.