Personal development Archives - Page 15 of 21

How The Past And The Future Can Get In The Way

What takes people away from living in the moment is focussing heavily on the past or future. From the past, this could be remembering a bad experience or wishing you were 10 years younger again. From the future you could be living in a negative version of yourself or what’s to come, you expect the worst-case scenario which can cause a lot of stress and anxiety for no reason.

I’ve been in both and it sucks. It’s something I have no control over and I have come to realise it’s not healthy for my mindset. Now I take control of the past or future whenever I spend time there. I only visit the past for success stories I call my victory list and I only visit my future for planning a positive outcome or seeing myself in a moment I want. I do my best not live any negative version of myself because this brings my mindset down to its knees if I let it.

Focus On The Now

7 exciting ways to focus more on the present

Through studies on happiness. Living in the present is a big factor in how you can take control of your inner happiness. It’s something I have been working on daily for a long time building my willpower to withstand the distraction of my past and future self and be present in that moment.

When we live in the present we can be grateful for what we have built for ourself and how we intend to develop ourself today for a better tomorrow. Focussing on the present depletes stress and anxiety and the more we live there the better we are within our mind.

It allows us to be grateful for family and friends we have, the environment around us and the gratefulness to be alive today.

Take a minute to look up and live in the present. How does it feel? As I was writing this I did this too and in the middle of my stomach, a feeling emerged that’s hard to describe but overall a feeling of content and happiness came about. This is a fuel we should keep topped up. Living 80% in the present and 10% in either the past or future. This will help lead a life of happiness and creates an opportunity to get more stuff done and end procrastination.

The Comparison From Yesteryear

We shouldn’t compare but we should be grateful for the privileges we have. If we compare ourselves from the average person living before the 1920s. Our standard of living as a whole is far superior and we take for granted running taps with freshwater hot or cold even an indoor toilet.

These things we can sometimes take for granted whereas it would be seen as a luxury not too long ago. Be grateful for the information we have at our fingertips. The average person can know more now than anyone from their family tree.

How I have Become More Present

Below I will discuss techniques that have allowed me to stay in the present. I’m no Buddhist monk but I’m a work in progress to live a more present life. What’s helped me is catching myself drifting too far into the past or future. If it’s something positive I let myself remain to see it’s full benefits but if it’s negative I get the hell out of there intermediately. From focussing on this I live a happier more fulfilled life. The reason I’m writing this is that I want this for you and for you to go on this journey to find your inner peace and happiness.

So below are my favourite 7 exciting ways to focus more on the present.

Tips to stay in the present

Turn Off Autopilot And Be Conscious

What can zap away being present is living life constantly on autopilot especially a constant routine that you do without thinking. Going day by day doing the same thing. Daydreaming about the future and living in the past are ways that can demoralise the best of us if left there. When you shake yourself off and begin to be conscious of where you are, this is when you can be grateful for the now and what you have in that present moment.

Focus On Your Breath

Breathing is an amazing way to be present in the moment. With all the wandering thoughts that can happen throughout the day. Coming back to the breath is an important way to regain control. Proven with studies it has many benefits to health as well as keeping us alive.

Importance Of Journaling

This is a great way to zone in on the present as you have to be consciously present to able to write what’s happening with your day and life. With amazing health benefits to boot. Journaling for me helps me gain control of my many wandering thoughts and puts them on paper and stay conscious with every thought. Also reviewing your day is a great way to stay present with what’s happening in your life.

Turn Off All Technology

In the digital age, there is nothing that can compete with taking you away from your present life. You can be hooked watching never-ending YouTube channels, streaming services and games. When you turn off your phone and become present you see what you have and what’s actually around you. Set yourself a challenge of putting your phone down and look up and experience what’s around you.

Get Out Into Nature

Getting out in nature allows you to focus on the now and create an abundance of gratefulness for what’s around you. It’s being proven to boost mood when in nature and it can create a feeling of being alive in the moment. Find your spot wherever you are to stay present in nature.

Start Listening

Sometimes we can talk too much or just zone out of conversations. Try staying present and focusing on listening intently to the person you’re communicating with. As well as building a more engaging relationship. This allows you to zone in on what’s happening right now.

Start Yoga

This is one of the best physical activities that keep you centred and in the moment. With you focussing on every breath and stance. It’s hard for you to getaway. Yoga teaches you about staying present and from your efforts you feel amazing from it.

Final Thoughts

All of the above 7 exciting ways to focus more on the present allows you to slow your life down and live in the present. When we do this we start to feel grateful for the moments we have and everything within it. How can you stay more present? Do you feel more grateful when you focus on what you have?

By Adam Smith

How to find happiness

After writing the previous post about unhappiness and what causes it. This is going to be about 8 ways how to find happiness right now. A topic that has been discussed all the way back to Aristotle and Plato with the foremost saying “Happiness depends on ourselves.” Aristotle enshrines happiness as a central purpose of human life and a goal in itself. Aristotle also described eudaimonia (Meaning happiness in Greek) as the goal of human thought and action.

In modern times I follow the very well known influencer Gary Vee who talks repeatedly about happiness and the importance of attaining it in your life. With some of the most influential people on the planet from the past and present stating the importance of happiness. Why isn’t it taught in our school system? How is it not readily talked about in friendship groups or at home? Why isn’t it the main priority in life?

Happiness is an important goal to attain

For me, our long term happiness should be something we should focus on. Doing so by not listening to the wants of our parents, friends, spouse, colleagues, mentors and even society. We just need to listen deep within ourselves of what we want in life that will make us happy. When you find out what makes you happy you can then build your life around happiness instead of trying to build happiness around something someone said should make you happy.

For ideas on what you should focus on to find your inner happiness take a look below for the 8 ways how to find happiness right now.

Finding Happiness

Give Back

I read a story about a man called Kenneth Behring who has appeared numerous times on the Forbes wealthiest list. He described his life in 4 stages.

The first stages were MORE STUFF where he got a nice car and house. The second stage was BETTER STUFF where he upgraded what he had to a mansion and a private jet. The third stage was DIFFERENT STUFF where he bought classic cars and owned an NFL football team.

All this was in search of happiness but he never found it until he came across the fourth stage GIVE STUFF were unexpectedly on his way back from Africa he made a stop in Romania where he delivered 6 wheelchairs to a hospital. His experience with an elderly man there gave him more joy and gratitude than he had ever experienced before.

This led to him giving away over 940,000 wheelchairs across the world. Fancy stuff is nice to have but this should be a bonus not the main goal in life.

The main goal in life should be to give back and serve others. There you will find your true happiness.

Spend more time with loved ones

It’s been proven in studies that top of the list for peoples happiness is healthy relationships. What makes humans strong is a social connection and has helped humans survive on earth to this day. The bonds of friendship and love are powerful forces in this world. It makes sense that this is one of the main factors of happiness. If you have already found this, don’t let go of it or take it for granted. Nurture it and let it grow.

If you haven’t found this yet. I hope this community we are building can help or one of my favourite community’s is the YES Theory where people who have never met each other before meet up and create friendships with like-minded people. Happiness for me comes from quality relationships with people who make you happy.

Create amazing experiences

The focus on material goods is great for quick short term happiness. This can be buying that new t-shirt or a 50 inch TV but these feelings are fleeting. What gets stuck into humans consciousness is experiences. These are stories you tell to people. It could be something funny, out of this world or a challenge you overcome. When I’ve seen true happiness in peoples faces is when I hear the stories of their experiences. What amazing experiences have you achieved? What’s next to come?

Chase discomfort

I’ve learned that being comfortable does not bring you long term happiness. It brings you short term that leads into unhappiness if you stay there. In life, you have to take risks to move forward. Asking the person you like out on a date or facing your fears by jumping out of a plane. It’s been proven when we feel uncomfortable this is where we feel most alive. It can lead to some of the most amazing experiences that change our life. Write down a list that all the things that you want to do in your life and go do it no matter how uncomfortable they are to do. There you will find happiness.

Have a hobby

Having a hobby is a great way to spend time not thinking about any of your responsibilities and just live in the moment of the favourite things you love doing. This could be a sport, singing, dancing or photography. It can be anything you love to do. Make space for it in your life, don’t put it off like it’s not a priority.

Be financially secure

Nothing makes people happier than their finances being in order. This is not earning a billion pounds, this is earning an amount of money that fits the lifestyle you want where you don’t worry about anything important like food, electricity, water or any of the main essentials of life. Unhappiness defiantly comes from being in debt and out of control of your finances. By finding a way to fix this, it will lead you to happiness.

Learn to make money doing what you love

Leading on from the last point about being financially secure. If you can build your wealth around doing something you love, you will be happy. People who have found this say it all the time. My last memory is Ricky Gervais who’s the writer and actor of The office said: “choose a job you love, and you’ll never have to work a day of your life”. He’s found his true passion and you have to find yours or close to it that you can build a life around. This is where happiness lies and the best thing about it, we all have different passions, so there are many opportunities to be created.

Be in nature and travel more

We are born from the earth so it makes sense that we get our true happiness from being within it. Whether it’s taking a walk around your local park or travelling to new destinations around the world. Humans get an amazing effect on them when they are apart of nature. For me, I love it. When I’m out in the English countryside or travelling to Barcelona I get the same feelings of happiness. So make sure you fit into your daily schedule to be one with nature wherever you live and try and go a bit further afield when you can.

Final Thoughts

This list could have gone on for some time. The main message is that there are so many possibilities to find happiness in your life. Instead of focusing on what outside forces make us happy, we should focus on what makes us happy from within.

I thought a high paying job, nice car and home would bring me happiness but it didn’t. I’ve learned that my family bring me the most joy and I’m building my life around them. With the next layer being travel and amazing experiences.

You could look at happiness being like the core of the earth which is the major force that keeps the planet together. To keep your life together have happiness as the central part and treat happiness as the beating heart of your life and build your life around it.

What makes you happy? How are you going to find your happiness? Was happiness a priority in childhood?

We would love to know the answer to these questions. I hope you enjoyed this post. Be happy, Stay happy.